The year I turned 29, Bob and I decided to treat ourselves and headed to Hawaii for our 5th anniversary. It was an amazing time and a break we both needed desperately. We had a direct flight from Detroit to Honolulu. We spent one night there so we could tour Pearl Harbor the next morning. We then headed to Maui for a week. We are actually thinking about heading back in 2015 to celebrate our 40th birthdays! I think that trip in 2003 was one of the first times we truly relaxed together. I was feeling pretty good at the time and we enjoyed having the chance to isolate ourselves and leave our worries on the mainland. From scuba diving off the back of a catamaran, hearing whales sing underwater, and having a picnic by a waterfall on the way to Hana, we truly enjoyed this time of pure bliss. We have learned since then the importance of getting away together to reconnect. It is definitely a happy thought for me.
I know it is a common feeling at this point in marathon training, but I am feeling pretty burned out. I have been running consistently and training for something for over a year now and I am just tired. What's funny is, I have not even broken into my longer runs yet. It sure does make the next two months feel really intimidating. I am nervously anticipating my run this Saturday as I will take on my longest run yet - 15 miles. The last two weeks have not been easy for me in terms of my training. I have attempted to run with a local running club the past two Saturdays. My problem is, I am just not up to their pace yet. This issue did not seem to matter the first Saturday I was with them since we were running through Buckhead neighborhoods and there were a lot of people out and about. I just do not want to feel alone. However, this past Saturday was a different story. After about 2 miles into my run, I ended up in neighborhoods I was unfamiliar with near Grant Park and was completely alone. I had a page full of turns and directions to get me through my 10 miles, but I have to say I was nervous. I did not know my surroundings and I was spending more time finding my next turn instead of focusing on my running.
So, in moving forward, I think I am going to head back to my favorite trail. This would not be an issue for me, except for the fact that just two weeks ago, a young runner was attacked on the trail at miles 19.2 and brutally beaten. I have thought about her and her family a lot and send my love and prayers to them as she fights to recover. However, in being honest, I have been spooked by it. I will never be out that far on the trail, but it doesn't mean it could not happen anywhere. I have grown scared of being out there without other people nearby. It should not be this way. I am proud our community has taken this trail back by storm and refuse to let someone scare us all off from doing what we love. Therefore, my feet will be hitting the familiar pavement of the Silver Comet Trail next Saturday for my 15-mile run. The trail is bustling with people every Saturday morning, so I will be running with them as I go 7.5 miles out and 7.5 miles back. I just want to run and focus on my own race.
The past two weeks have also thrown a big, unanticipated obstacle in my way. I wasn't sure I was going to share this here, but why should I stop holding back now. I ran 12 miles on the trail two weeks ago and my ostomy started giving me trouble. I realized I had never run this far in the heat and my body was not reacting well. I think the sweat and heat are the problem, but I have to overcome it either way. It happened again the following Saturday when I ran 13 miles. I was over the top frustrated. I am taking some steps to problem solve, but I won't know until I get out there again. I was fine during my 10 mile run this past Saturday, but next weekend will be a big test. I never anticipated this being an issue, but I will not let it keep me from meeting my goal. I am also starting to feel the aches and pains that come with these long distances, mainly in my left leg and hip. Stretching, foam roller, and ice are my best friends right now. I am also going to make an appointment with my physical therapist this week.
I busted open my new running shoes this weekend for my 10 mile run. These bright baby blues will take me across the finish line in Chicago! My feet are pretty excited to have these happy colors holding them close. My niece Kaylen was with me when we bought these shoes a couple of weeks ago. We also bought some new socks, which included a bright pink pair that I told her I would wear in her honor on race day.
The best feeling that has come out of the past two weeks of running is knowing I can do this and trusting my legs. As long as I continue to stretch, eat right, and prepare my body, I know I can do this. It does not mean I am not terrified and walking around with a nervous stomach many days, but I know I can run this marathon. Through writing this blog, sharing my experience and thoughts, I am finding my true self. Sometimes I cry, get mad, feel depressed and unsure, but at the end of the day, I can stand up and know I am being my best self. It is important for me to show the world that, but most of all, I have to show it to myself. I want to run into my 40s with confidence and strength, and no matter what happens, I know that wish will come true.
Here is one of my favorites quotes that Bob sent me this weekend before my run . . . some inspiration for your week!
Check out my personal fundraising page for the Les Turner ALS Foundation - http://ow.ly/ukTos.
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